WHAT A YEAR!

I can't quite get my head around the fact that the last day of 2016 has been and gone, how crazy!?

When I think of 2016 as a year my brain seems to conjure up a complete blur of things, experiences and emotions that have taken place throughout the year.

 For me this all comes across as such a blur as 2016 feels like several years have passed rather than just one- simply because of how significantly my day to day life has changed:  how I have developed and changed as a person, how my surroundings have dramatically changed and also how I occupy my spare time differently, I've also visited and explored so many different places over the last year which I have absolutely loved and it just makes me want to travel more!

The biggest change

Obviously It is completely normal and part of life to experience changes throughout a year, however this year really has tested me and pushed me right out of my comfort zone and I am so grateful for it!

I would say the biggest change that I have gone through in 2016 was leaving school and practically entering the working world by starting an apprenticeship at the council! When I started considering my post 16 options in year 11 I did not imagine that I would be sat at my own desk, in a fully functioning office, with a job to do -as staying at school was my plan.

Trusting my gut and taking a leap of faith was definitely a giant step forward for me at this time as throughout year 11 I definitely struggled with anxiety and self confidence... but little did I know that I would develop so much through doing the apprenticeship!

 Yes this was me on my first day of my apprenticeship- why so serious? haha

Some of the adventures

In 2016 I visited quite a few new places:

Camber/Hastings 

This holiday sticks vibrantly in my mind as it was in the middle of when I was revising for my exams, I took my revision and did a little bit each day however I definitely allowed myself t relax and did lots of photography!

Volendam/Holland

I honestly had no idea what to expect from this holiday as I had never been to Holland or anywhere like it. I loved this holiday and everything about Holland but in particular Volendam- I feel like I could easily have stayed there- I love their ways of life; almost everyone travels by bikes, everyone was so friendly and also the town is so calm and beautiful- full of colour, lots of boats and happiness!

If you want to see more of my Volendam/Holland holiday then go over to my youtube channel as I daily vlogged whilst I was there, I'll link it HERE

Majorca!

Unfortunately when I was in Majorca I didn't take a lot of photos or vlog (I did one vlog I'll link it HERE) but although I didn't really document this holiday it was a really nice holiday- the weather was insane and the place we stayed in was beautiful! We went to some beautiful beaches, jumped of some big rocks and went to an awesome waterpark! I would definitely like to go back!

Camp de Marr was definitely my favourite place in Majorca and it has a lovely restaurant there!

Blackpool 

Most recently I went to blackpool for the first time, with my dad, Shona, Morgan and Liam! We went for a long weekend which gave us enough time to see some of the main attraction there: including Blackpool tower, the illuminations and a visit to Blackpool dungeons. I managed to vlog this holiday and I will link it HERE for you! I would definitely recommend Blackpool for a fun weekend away!

My firsts!

There have been a few firsts in 2016: 

Mine and Chad's first ever concert! Yes it took us that long to go to one, but typically they're really expensive or really far away etc. so when I saw that Jack Garratt was performing at the Engine Shed I had to get tickets! Not only did we get to go but we were literally right at the front! Me and Chad both love Jack's music and the atmosphere was insane. HERE is the vlog with the concert in.

Starting the gym! I use to be so scared of the thought of starting a gym- I thought everyone would look at me and that I wouldn't know what to do... I was so wrong and I should have started before. Me and Chad now go to the gym about 4 times a week and we love it, it helps me physically and also to wind down mentally. 

Starting youtube!

I was so skeptical about starting youtube at first, but when I trialled it out when I was in Holland- I absolutely loved it! It has definitely become one of my hobbies and It allows me to use some of my creative side. Since starting youtube I have 100% gained more confidence and discovered my love for film making/ being behind and in front of a camera. I was so surprised to reach 100 subscribers, the support means a lot! If you haven't had a look already then I will link my youtube channel HERE

I could go on and on about 2016 and the good and bad parts of it- but I don't want to make this post any longer so I will leave that for another day! I hope each and every one of you has a happy and prosperous 2017, make it a good one.  

A welcoming into the working world! (my apprenticeship)

So you may recall me mentioning the fact that I was soon to be starting my new apprenticeship with the city of Lincoln council, I started on Wednesday the 13th of July (a few days ago) and despite all the changes I am facing I have been thoroughly enjoying it so far, and I am so happy that I went with my gut feeling to go forward with the apprenticeship!

My first day was blur, a stressful, surreal blur.. It wasn't really I just thought I wold insert a mean girls quote...

My first day... I was so nervous as I had to wait in reception to be collected and then taken to my office and for me waiting just makes it 10 times worse, it's just a way of building up the suspension and adrenaline! I am so lucky as I've been placed in an office with only a few other people (who are so lovely and welcoming) I have already done all-sorts of tasks and so far I have NO REGRETS about my decision to leave school! The work I've been doing is so interesting and also rewarding!

It is weird, not being treated like a student anymore, instead a colleague, a member of staff! I feel as if I am already learning and gaining much more relevant information and skills that I will/have learnt in school, this is just my opinion and I am aware that everyone learns in different ways, but if you are doubting whether to do an apprenticeship (as long as it's something you are very interested in) then I would say go for it!

The other new aspects of starting work are the early mornings and getting buses all the time. For someone who is use to waking up at 7/7:30 on a week day these 6:20 starts have taken a bit of getting use to, as well as getting buses all the time! Although it sounds as if I'm complaining, I am glad that I am starting to become even more independent and gaining experience of what the working world is like.

A part of me will miss the school environment and all the holidays you get there, but as I have now repeated several times I am so happy with my first proper job/apprenticeship, I have already found out so many interesting facts and talked to lots of interesting people as well as being warmly welcomed and settling in nicely.

One more thing is that as you may know I have struggled with anxiety over the last few years and even though I still sometimes find myself in a state over silly things, I have gone into my new job with confidence, pride and an open mind and I feel like in a way I have left a lot of anxiety, doubt and shyness at school! A new start is always a great opportunity to become more confident and discover yourself!

Sorry for the long rambley post but I thought I would give you an update on what I've been doing!

5 things for those down days!

Everyone has those days where you just feel absolutely rubbish, unmotivated and down, lets face it those days are inevitable as no one can be happy 100% of the time and if someone says they are or tries to act like they are then they're faking happiness..

I thought I would share 5 things/tips that can help you get through those dreaded days and hopefully make you feel a little better.

1. Go for a nice bath, give yourself some time to relax and once you are out put on a good play list and do your hair, makeup or just put on some nice clothes- I find that this makes you feel better about yourself and that instantly improves your mood (In my opinion)

2. Try and get out of the house, whether it's to meet with some friends or going for a relaxing walk on your own, getting out is essential for improving your mood and mind set! If you stay in you'll only feel rubbish and have more time to feel down.

3. Make yourself some nice food and get a nice beverage, If you can, try and reach for something healthy like a chicken salad or some nice pasta, if you eat crap then it will reflect on your mood and your body- only making you feel worse! My go to drinks are normally peppermint tea, camomile tea or some water with ice and lemon, I am aware these aren't to everyone's tastes however they are amazing for your health and great for relaxing.

4. Exercise! Releasing good endorphins through exercise is a great way to lighten your mood and get you motivated, It doesn't have to be anything drastic, a little jog around the village or taking your dog on a walk will do! If you feel hesitant towards exercising then just go for it, you will feel better for it after.

5. A feel good movie, this one's simple however sometimes it can really help to improve your mood! Try and avoid anything that will make you feel sad, as tempting as it is it's only going to reflect on your mood...Your favourite series or film might just cheer you up a little.

That's all for today's post, I'll be back with another post soon!

A catch up and Coconutlane.com!

There's several reasons why I haven't done a blog post in so long, firstly I'm trying to revise, I've also been working more and lastly I have felt restricted by myself, restricted to relax and surround myself with normality's. I feel so overwhelmed. I have recently found myself staring into a space of confusion and obliviousness; completely unaware of what's going on around me, and then I'm back. I feel that the problem is how stressed and pressured I have been feeling towards exams and I know that I shouldn't have stopped normal leisurely things that keep me motivated and extra happy, such as being around my horses, doing work outs, blogging!  I am still happy but I am definitely not my normal self even if I have been covering it all up with a smile and a dash of artificial confidence.

There really isn't much purpose of this post, in fact this is more for me, but what I'm trying to say is it is essential to keep a balance between work, pressure and order and fun, leisure and relaxation. Evidently I have been amid the stress and pressures that I have put onto myself and failed to keep a balance resulting in me being in a constant blur of stress and exhaustion, feeling RUBBISH.

Despite the fact that you may feel the need to do endless hours of revision and work, you can give yourself some time to relax, go outside, do the things that you like doing and most importantly be kind to yourself because at the end of all this your health and well being are more important than your grades (even if you won't admit it)

Something that cheered me up yesterday was the email I received from Coconutlane.com, I am officially a representative for their lovely brand! I will be doing lots of reviews on their products over the next few months! You can get 20% off any purchase at Coconutlane.com when you use the code 'lauryn20'

Here are a few of the gorgeous goodies you can find on their website

That's all for today and I'll be back soon with a more cheerful post! I hope you're enjoying your half term break!

Over coming Anxiety and becoming happier!

Last year wasn't a great year for me, not because anything drastic had happened or anything physically challenging but because of Anxiety. Many people told me "It's just in your head, ignore it" they were completely right in saying "it was just in my head" however ignoring it does nothing, ignoring it makes it ten times worse.

 The first step to dealing with any mental health issue is going to see a specialist and that is exactly what i did, sometimes speaking to someone about what's on your mind and your problems really does make a difference, i really recommend relate in Lincoln as they're really understanding and also there's free coffee haha! One of the techniques my counsellor told me to do is write at least 5 positives down every day, at first i thought this was a stupid idea... how was this meant to change how i felt? After giving it a try i changed my mind, writing down the positives meant that when i felt anxious and down i could read all the good things that were happening in my life and cancel out some of the negative feelings.

The next thing that helped me get through each day was doing the thing I love, riding my horses, although I always seemed to be worrying about everything I found that when I took one of my horses for a ride with my mum, or on my own I felt like I could relax and forget about all the thoughts and stresses I had going round my head. Try to find something that allows you to escape the madness of everyday life and really de-stress, go for a run? Watch a film? Read a book?

The main thing that has helped me grow to be the more confident, happier person I am now is my mum, my dad and also my amazing boyfriend, who had helped me adopt the more carefree, chilled attitude that he has! As well as being there for me all the time,giving me a hug when I need one or just being there to listen and reassure me, so thank you❤️ Having someone who understands and is there for you is definitely one of the best things for when you're feeling down or generally stressed! 

Try and stay as positive as possible and have faith that you will become happier, because you will. All bad, low times come to an end and better aspects of life will come even if you don't see it now!

More of a chatty, serious post tonight. I'm sorry for the lack of posts this week, I have been revising and very busy with my horses. That's all for tonight...

Lauryn x